I love my kids. I really do. And there comes a time when that love is tested. Such as when the GI doctor tells you your 7-year-old has to do a colon cleanse, followed by your (not-so) brave decision to do the cleanse with your son. Maybe, I should have thought about that for a little longer. But I didn’t.
Day 1: We’re doing ok. I prepped S days before, front loading him regarding our expectations, his expectations and what we’re hoping to accomplish. Thankfully, his brothers are having fun with this new diet which they call “junk food diet”–jello, juice, popsicles, and broth. The first three are not readily available in our house. It’s a rare, rare thing so for them this is all good. By evening, S is getting impatient. He wants food. I want to say “So do I! So do I!!” Instead I glare at my husband who was eating toasted bread with butter. The smell, so heavenly. My husband is a smart man who occasionally does stupid things. Stupid: he toasted bread AND ate it while sitting no more than a foot from me. Smart: he left as soon as I gave him the death glare.
My best friend for two days. Boxes of it. Thank you Costco.
Day 2: I’ve decided to stay in bed today. The weather is rainy and cloudy. Perfect day for it. But also, I want to stay away from the kitchen. S comes into our bedroom, asking what time it is. Again. I promised the kid last night that when 6:00pm comes around today, he can pick a place to eat and it’ll just be me and him. I’d give you one guess what place he choose. So, happy meal it will be, I guess.
So we survived it. Kid did better than I did. One thing I did learn about this cleanse thing is that I do get ragey when I’m hungry. A fact I denied for years. But now I can deny it no longer. I’m not a nice person when I’m not eating.